How many times have you heard the saying that, “So and so is talented”? Some people will go as far as saying , “Well I’m not cut out for it.” Sometimes, when all our doubts, fears and insecurities wrap ourselves up, we always come up with the idea of “I wish I was somebody else.”
More often than not, we think and believe that someone or rather, most people are better than us – when in reality, the fact is, most people are more scared than us.
Isn’t it funny? We look at other people, envy them for looking so outrageously perfect and wish we could trade places with them, while they look at us and think of the same thing.
We are insecure of other people who themselves are insecure of us. We suffer from low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence and lose hope in self improvement because we are enveloped in quiet desperation.
Stop thinking of yourselves as second-rate beings. Forget the repetitive thought of “If only I was richer… if only I was thinner” and so on. Below are a few more tips that can work wonders:
Have a clear vision
Well I know that this many of us have heard this before. But it is true. Many just drift in life. They, like a dead fish, just follow the course of the river. They just do what everybody is doing.
They follow the band wagon. This is a recipe for failure in everything. You must have a solid foundation on what you want as a person. Ask some hard questions about every decision you make. If it doesn’t align with your vision, discard it.
Talk to a friend
One key to self improvement is to LISTEN and TALK to a trusted friend. Find someone who you find comfort in opening up with even the most gentle topics you want to discuss. Ask questions like “do you think I am ill-mannered?”, “Do I always sound so argumentative?”, “Do I talk too loud?”, “Does my breath smell?”, “Do I ever bore you when were together?”.
In this way, the other person will obviously know that you are interested in the process of self improvement. Lend her your ears for comments and criticisms and don’t give her answers like “Don’t exaggerate! That’s just the way I am!” Open up your mind and heart as well. And in return, you may want to help your friend with constructive criticism that will also help her improve her self.
Engage in purposeful practice
Well now you can forget about “Practice makes perfect” notion. It is as somebody one said to me “Practice makes perfect as long as practice is perfect.” Well many of us, academically, cannot rightly be deemed as bright. But we somehow made it.
However, to really succeed in this thing called life, you have to be a mathematician in a sense. How does anyone come to be good with numbers? Guess what, constant interaction with numbers. Consistent and focused practice can makes good mathematicians of us. That’s how we can all forward ourselves into that level of excellent. Don’t just do things to get by in life. Practice with purpose. Be intentional.
Little things mean BIG to other people
Sometimes, we don’t realize that the little things that we do like a pat on the back, saying “hi” or “hello”, greeting someone “good day” or telling Mr. Thabo something like “hey, I love your tie!” are simple things that mean so much to other people. When we’re being appreciative about beautiful things around us and other people, we also become beautiful to them.
We always wish we had better things, better features, better body parts, etc. But life need not to be perfect for people to be happy about themselves. Self improvement and loving yourself is not a matter of shouting to the whole world that you are perfect and you are the best. It’s the virtue of acceptance and contentment. When we begin to improve ourselves, we then begin to feel contented and happy.