5 easy steps to emotional intelligence

By Selloane Tseka (Guest Post)

Photo by Jordan Whitfield on Unsplash

It is well known that people who get along easily with others tend to be more likeable. Emotional intelligence is the ability to identify and manage one’s own emotions and of people around them. This in turn makes individuals good problem solvers and great team players.  This is a very useful skill to have, beneficial to someone’s career and their personal life.

 Self awareness

Have a better understanding of your emotions so they don’t dictate your actions. Also know your strengths and weaknesses. This in turn leads to less pretending. You will be able to look at yourself in an honest manner then work towards turning yourself into a better person.

Self regulating

Learn to control your emotions and impulses, to think before you act, and become thoughtful. Be comfortable with change, integrity, and the ability to say no. Every time you feel like erupting into flames when something doesn’t go according to plan take a moment to cool down and think of a way out of the situation.


Motivated people are able to defer immediate results for long term success, are highly productive, love a challenge and are very effective. Staying positive keeps one on their toes to always be on the go and productive. If you fill your mind with negativity it will slow you down and become an impediment to your success.


This is the ability to identify with and understand the wants, needs, and viewpoints of those around you. Empathetic people are good at managing relationships, listening and relating to others because they don’t judge and stereotype too quickly. People would be drawn to you and feel comfortable in your company if they are confident in your genuine concern for their well-being.

Humility and patience

Keep calm under any situation. Do not hoard all the attention even if you feel you deserve it. It’s okay to praise others and let the light shine on them. You can’t always be right all the time. Being humble will again make you approachable and easy going, recognizing and apologizing for one’s mistakes also becomes much easier.

It’s not always about proving how tough you are by giving in to anger and lashing out at the world and destroying relationships, dominating others, this will be detrimental to yourself and your career, nobody wants to sleep with a tiger.

Selloane Tseka is a writer from Lesotho her Novel, A Route Taken was published on Amazon in 2016.  Her short story Mamotimpana was featured in the Lesotho Anthology of writers: New Writing From Lesotho. She also has contributed a collection of poetry in Kalahari review.

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